I don’t understand why this always happens to me.

It doesn’t *always* happen, and certainly not only to you.

Well, it definitely feels that way.

Only because you insist on being stubborn about trying way too hard.

You know I have to… it’s the only way I can keep things under control.

*SNORT*

What’s so funny?

What you just said, keep things under control.

Seriously!? You think it’s funny!? Do you have any idea what a hot mess my life would be if I didn’t try as hard as I do to hold the reins tight!?

I don’t know about the hot and messy part, but I’m sure it would be easier… maybe even happier.

That’s stupid.

Is it? So far all this “control” has earned you is a series of head bangs against the wall, not to mention a life’s worth of frustration.

It’s not my fault if people always seem to find a way to mess up the most carefully detailed plans.

It’s not people, it’s life. That’s just the way reality works, like a crazy and unpredictable mess.

So what? I’m supposed to just give up and let the chaos sweep me away?

No. But you shouldn’t insist on trying to swim against a current you just can’t control either.

Don’t fight against the tide but don’t let it sweep and drown me. This is a fucking “fight without fighting” koan, isn’t it?

No, silly. It only sounds that way because you haven’t considered other options.

Such as?

You could always learn to surf.